Unsure about the future? Need love advice? Career guidance? Wondering which organ to sell to make next month's rent? The Cracked Asstrology App has all the answers.
Rated the #1 Most Scientifically Accurate Horoscope App by Cracked.com and its subsidiaries, Asstrology has put together a team of astrologers who have internet access. Meet Professor Gort, who has the astrological acumen of a super-computer; Erin, a genuine clairvoyant (even though she's still not very good at it); Sean, our resident sell-out; Liz, who'd rather be doing anything else than this job; Keith (we'll tell you about him later...); and Jeffrey, aka The Zodiac Time-Killer!